Everyone knows that there are two sides to every disagreement: the wrong side and my side. The following are two accounts of a highly dangerous and potentially traumatic event that happened a few days ago. One is from my family’s perspective (AKA the wrong side). The other is from my point of view (AKA the right side). Let’s see if my loyal readers can figure out which is which.
Account One: Rigby was in the middle of his hourly rounds; making his way through the house checking for unwanted interlopers, food which had yet to be taste tested, and the working status of the air conditioners (he made note that while all the air conditioners were on, they were not cooling the rooms down nearly enough…obviously an OSHA issue in the making). Having checked the kitchen and dining room, Rigby made his way into the living room, cycling past Sister’s chair. It was then that he was suddenly ambushed; something jumped off the chair and attacked him. There was only one course of action: Rigby had to fight. He pinned the attacker down with his paw, grabbed a mouthful of stuffing, and began to pull. The attacker fought back, but it was no match for Rigby, Security Extraordinaire.
Account Two: Rigby was mooching for food and looking for trouble. After getting kicked out of the kitchen for excessive drooling, he slunk into the living room where he noticed that Ma had left a couch pillow on Sister’s chair. As he approached it, he discovered that the zipper pull on that pillow was facing out toward the room. Being physically unable to ignore anything that is metal and shiny, Rigby sauntered over to the pillow, grabbed hold of the zipper pull, and started gnawing at it with his large gnashing back teeth. Eventually, Rigby tugged the pillow off of the chair and onto the floor at which point, using his foot for leverage, he started pulling on the zipper pull in earnest.
Now tell me, loyal readers, which account sounds more plausible?
