Today is National Puppy Day!
Now, it’s been a long time since I was a pup, but who am I to miss out on a celebration?
Harkening back on my puppy days, I would be remiss if I didn’t remind all my loyal readers that despite being born the cutest puppy in the entire world, I was a bit of a juvenile delinquent. No, I think I can go a step further. I was a complete and total terror with gnashing teeth that were disturbingly large given the size of my mouth. Don’t believe me? May I directly you to my award-winning (okay, I didn’t win any awards, but I should have) series within a series: The Puppy Files.
- The Fleeing Song: Where a catchy song becomes an anthem.
- Home Alone with Sister: Where Sister yanks out my dew claw.
- Moving a Building: Where I earn my tough guy scar.
- My Overly Toothy Grin: Where my beloved needle-sharp baby teeth fall out and are replaced, happily, by even larger ones.
- A Tail’s Tale: Where I bravely confront the guy who’s been following me everywhere.
- Rigby v. Rug: Where I try to cover up a crime with a felony.
- My Only Friend: Where I seek out a friend after pissing off my entire family.
- Autodefenestration: Where I jump out of a moving vehicle.
- Impaired Vision: Where an unidentified floating object temporarily distracts me from chewing on Sister’s hands.
- Taste Tester: Where I cautiously examine all foods given to me for fear of payback for my bad behavior.
- Punishment Walks: Where my rambunctiousness results in my family taking me on never ending walks.
- Fourth of July: Where I pretend to be afraid of fireworks to mooch carrots off people.
- An Honest Mistake: Where I visit a street fair and lunge at a giant acrobatic swan.
But enough about that—enough about my misspent youth. National Puppy Day is all about cute little puppies and, as I said, I was the cutest puppy of them all. So, without further ado: Me as a Puppy.
