Autumn Naps

Every summer it’s the same thing. I lull my family into believing that perhaps I’ve grown up or calmed down due to the sheer amount of time I spend hanging around the house snoozing (usually in a pool of slobber). When I do get up, it’s usually only because I absolutely have to (I have to go out, I have to beg for food, I have to rid the backyard of squirrels) and even then, most of the time it's just for a quick jaunt before returning to my prone position in the air conditioning. And then…BAM!...the summer heat dissipates, the air becomes cool and crisp, and suddenly I’m back to my normal troublesome and energy-filled self, leaving my family, who had become accustomed to my laziness, flat footed and scrambling to keep up.

But despite this influx of puppy energy, I am, and will always be, an expert in relaxation and sleep.

Here’s me snoozing on the couch. During the summer months, even with the air conditioner on full blast in the window right behind me, I rarely sleep on the couch because it is just too hot. But as soon as the temperature gets a little bit cooler, there’s no stopping me. Now, every evening, after eating my PB&K and wiping my snout on the couch, I saunter over to my spot, put my front paws up on the cushion, and patiently wait for someone (usually Ma) to lift my back end up onto the couch. From there, I immediately throw myself down onto the cushion and stretch out as much as I possibly can, leaving my seatmate (also usually Ma) scrunched up in a corner.

My other favorite place to snooze is directly underneath the footrest of Sister’s reclining chair. Now, the extent to which I jam myself under the footrest depends on the day (sometimes it’s just my head, sometimes it’s just my back end, and sometimes it’s my entire body), but in the end, no matter what, I always make sure to pick a spot that inconveniences Sister the most. You see, with me occupying the floorspace under her footrest, Sister has no way of collapsing her chair once she’s in it. Instead, if she wants to get up, she needs to propel herself upward from a slightly reclined position while being careful to not step on me or completely topple over. It’s a lot of fun to watch.

This Face

This is my "there's an air conditioner in the window" face.  

This is my "there's an air conditioner in the window--why isn't it on?" face.  

This is my "there's an air conditioner in the window--why isn't it on?--it's 80 degrees in here" face.  

This is my "there's an air conditioner in the window--why isn't it on?--it's 80 degrees in here--I'm wearing a fur coat" face.  

This is my "there's an air conditioner in the window--why isn't it on?--it's 80 degrees in here--I'm wearing a fur coat--TURN ON THE DARN AIR CONDITIONER" face.

This face is usually accompanied by dramatic huffing, award winning sighing, and occasional fits of hysterical barking.

When you see this face, you should turn on the air conditioner.

The Summer Ain't Over Until the Dog Says So

Last week, with September waning, Pa decided that it was the perfect time to declare Summer 2020 to be over and to put away all the air conditioners in the house.  Needless to say, I was devastated by this news (the pulling of the air conditioners that is).  I mean, yeah, the last 3+ day heatwave we experienced was back in July, but the summer really isn’t over for me until there’s snow on the ground (hey, I wear a luxurious and full fur coat every day…I get hot).  Anyway, I watched in utter sorrow and disbelief as he went around the first floor pulling out the ACs from the living room and the bedroom.  With two down and one to go, Pa started up the stairs to Sister’s room, but, getting wind of his intentions, Sister, my hero, came running out of her office screaming “no.”  Sister explained to Pa that it was way too early to take out her air conditioner; that there were plenty more warm weather days to come.  Pa scoffed at Sister, but ultimately gave in to her pleas probably just to stop her from whining (the girl’s got some serious talent in that department).

A couple of days passed with cool nighttime temperatures, but then, Sunday came.

As soon as I got home from a weekend out east, I noticed how hot the house was and expressed my displeasure by panting dramatically.  Sister, always on the same wavelength as me, also commented about the heat and complained about the lack of air conditioning on the first floor.  Later, as the family sweated over their ravioli and meat sauce dinner, Sister promised me that she and I would sleep upstairs in the air conditioning that night.

Later when bedtime came around, I refused to snooze in Ma and Pa’s room while I waited for Sister to finish showering.  Instead, I sprawled out directly in front of the stairs going up to the second floor to make sure that Sister did not forget her promise and sneak off to bed without me.

And you know what?  It worked.  When Sister found me at the base of the stairs waiting for her, she leaned down and asked, “You wanna go up in the AC?”  Well, she didn’t have to ask me twice. I jumped up and scurried up the stairs as fast as I could.

Me and My AC

Eventually, Sister also made her way upstairs as well (she paused to say goodnight to Ma and Pa…I issued a single warning bark to hurry her along).  Upon entering her bedroom, she turned on the air conditioner and, I immediately ran to my pillow and began taking in the cooling breeze and white noise issuing from the air conditioner.  An hour later, once the room was nice and cool and Sister was huddled under a sheet and two blankets, I was able to truly relax and fell into a deep sleep along side Sister’s bed (so she’s trip over me if she decided to turn off the AC in the middle of the night).

Snoozing

Monday night wasn’t quite as warm as Sunday night, but I repeat…24/7 fur coat.  While Sister dawdled in the living room watching the news, I took up my spot in the hallway blocking her from the stairs.  When I heard the footrest fold back into her chair, I played it cool and kept my head down so as not to appear too anxious.  However, as soon as I heard her say goodnight to Ma and Pa, I quickly lifted my head and gave Sister my big brown eyes.

“Rigby,” she said, “you can come up, but I can’t promise that I’ll turn the air conditioner on.”

My eyes darted once toward the stairs and then back to Sister.

“It’s really not that hot,” Sister explained.

My eyes darted once toward the stairs and then back to Sister.

Sister sighed.  “Fine,” she said, “I’ll turn it on for now, but no guarantees it will be on all night.”

My eyes darted once toward the stairs and then back to Sister.

“Well, go ahead.  You wanna go up in the AC?”

Jumping up, I propelled myself forward toward the stairs and scurried up them as fast as my legs could carry me.

Once upstairs, Sister turned the AC on and I threw myself down on the floor next to her bed.  Minutes later, Sister was huddled under a sheet and two blankets and I, well, I was comfortable (you might want to turn the sound up for this video). 

Crazy From The Heat

I am not a fan of summer.

Sure, you’ll occasionally find me lounging on the driveway or on the deck baking in the sun because in small amounts it feels good, but by and large, I like to be cool and being cool means chilling inside with the air conditioner on full blast.

And what happens when there is a multi-day New York heat wave and the air conditioner is not running twenty-four hours a day?

I go crazy from the heat!

Now, my family might argue that it is virtually impossible to differentiate between my crazy from the heat howling/snout rubbing and my normal everyday howling/snout rubbing and to that I say...turn the air conditioner back on!