Monday is my seven-week anniversary as Sister’s Administrative Assistant and I think I’m proving to be a great employee if I do say so myself. I constantly check in with her, I make sure that she remains unstressed by insisting that she rubs my ears regularly, and I ensure that she has (and shares with me) a proper lunch each day. Sure, there’s some challenges we’ve had to face—Sister occasionally forgets to drag my desk (pillow) into her office, I’ve missed out on a lot of naps, and Sister has threatened to file a complaint with HR because I keep stealing her shoes—but that happens in all offices, right?
But aside from discovering that I’m an impressive Administrative Assistant, I have also learned something else about myself: I love video conferencing.
I know. I know. Most people hate video conferencing. They hate being on camera, they hate being recorded, and they hate having to try to look put together when in reality they haven’t worn anything fancier than daytime pajamas in weeks.
But me? As my loyal readers know, I'm always ready for my closeup. Sure, my family thinks I'm in need of a bath, but I know that my fur is always luxurious and flowing and looks even better when caked in dirt and covered in grass stains (it adds a level of ruggedness).
I'm also a known ham when it comes to any kind of photography (think of how naturally posing comes to me) and any ham worth his salt knows when the camera starts rolling and I'm no different. A minute after a video conference begins, I wake up from my nap (I was on break) and, if I’m not already there, make my way to Sister’s make-shift office. If the door is open, I walk in, but if I discover that the door is closed, I bark my super high pitched bark and refuse to stop until Sister excuses herself from the meeting and opens the door (it’s a reputation thing—if she doesn’t let me in her co-workers will think less of her for letting me bark so piteously). Once inside the room, I climb over my desk, step on Sister's binders, and force myself between her and her desk. But despite all this, I'm still out of range of the webcam, so I drape myself as far into Sister’s lap as possible (usually my chin is dripping from a recent drink of water) and lift my snout up in the air. By doing all this, I can just make my way into the frame.
And oh boy do I know when I’ve succeeded. Suddenly, all conversation (usually boring since the meeting is rarely about food) ceases and the computer speakers issue forth with a wave of "oohs" and "ahhs."
"Rigby!" I hear.
"Puppy!"
"What a cutie!"
"What's his name?"
"He's so beautiful!"
"Is he a Golden?"
It’s wonderful! Sure, it would be better if all those admirers were in the room with me, rubbing my belly and scratching my ears, but that wouldn't be the socially responsible thing to do right now. Sometimes, depending on the conference, Sister even lowers the webcam so that I can appear fully on screen without having to stretch. Needless to say, that’s when the virtual room explodes. All I can say is that I’m sure that my cuteness is responsible for countless deals Sister has made over the last month and a half.
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| Pa and Me |
From the sounds of it, I have many more days and weeks as Sister’s Administrative Assistant in front of me, and I can only hope that I have just as many video conferences in my future as well. But before anyone becomes concerned about me working too hard and stretching myself too thin, please know that I make sure to enjoy the simple things in life every day: I invade Pa’s personal space, I steal Ma’s napkin each night at dinner, I am wildly concerned whenever my family plays Wii Sports (I am not a fan), and I will always consider stealing Sister’s shoes a hobby rather than a job.
