A Fair Trade

The Two Rs:  Ralphie and Rigby

Before I begin, I'd like to take a moment to give a shout out to my pal Ralphie.  Ralphie had major surgery last week and is now at home recovering.  I hope you're feeling better Ralphie, and when you're up to it, tell your mom that you want to watch that video of me carrying on after one of my baths...I know how much you enjoy it!

And now, on to my post.

Some very wise man named Phil Pastoret once said:  "If you think dogs can’t count, try putting three dog biscuits in your pocket and then giving Fido only two of them."  Now, while I don't advocate subjecting your pooch to this experiment (under no circumstances should any dog be denied a cookie that is rightfully his...even if it is for science), I can vouch for the fact that it is one hundred percent true.  Dogs really can count!

Take me for instance.  I know that:

• people have two feet and each requires its own sock and shoe.  Therefore, when someone takes the sock/shoe that I just stole away from me, I know that there will be another one just like it back where I found the original.
• people have two hands and each requires its own glove.  Therefore, when someone takes the glove that I just stole away from me, I know that there will be another one just like it back where I found the original.

But my knowledge doesn't end there.  I also understand the importance of a fair trade or an even exchange.  You see, every time I happen upon something that I'd like to claim as my own (even though I know it isn't for me), I pick it up and leave one of my toys in its place.  Why do I do this?  Because it's the polite thing to do of course!

After years of trial and error, I've discovered that a tennis ball left on the bed (in addition to the muddy footprints I left behind when I jumped up on said bed) is fair trade for a mouthful of clean socks fresh from the dryer (dirty socks are better, but they are generally harder to come by as they live in a sealed hamper until they are brought down the basement to the washing machine) and Baby (my plush toy) is good for at least one of Sister's shoes (aside from ripping out the insoles, I really enjoy gnawing on the heels).  I've left my squeaky bone (one of my all time favorite toys) behind for one of Pa's snow boots (a high ticket item) and Nuclear Bunny, I've determined, is a perfect trade for an eye glass case pick-pocketed from Ma's pocketbook.

And it's not just me making trades; I've also trained my family to trade as well.  Once someone wrestles the pilfered item from my mouth (I'm not going to say that I'm ever happy about giving up my stolen merchandise), I'll happily take back whatever I left behind if it's offered to me.  Sister has even taken to trading me a cookie for my squeaker toy when I start plucking at its soft plastic at lunch time.

It just goes to show that humans can be taught too.