Rigby's Awesome Vacation

Last week my family was on vacation which means that I was not.  Don’t get me wrong, I love my family, it’s just that they are a bit high maintenance.  You see, when I’m home during the week and everyone is at work, I am able to maximize my nap time (and I think we can all agree on how important nap time is).  But when they are home, I have to keep an eye on them the entire time; make sure they stay out of trouble, floss regularly, and submit all their snacks to an inspection by yours truly (hey, we all have to make sacrifices sometimes).

But just because it was a working vacation for me doesn’t mean that I didn’t get the opportunity to have some fun.

The Fence 

I Swear, Trouble Finds Me

For the last year or so I have been lamenting how the house out east was severely lacking in the fence department.  Well, a couple of weeks ago Ma and Pa finally remedied that.  Some of my loyal readers might think that I would be ecstatic with this new development; that I would immediately run from one corner of the yard to the other for the first time, by myself, without being tethered to a family member by my leash.  To be honest, though, I didn't.  You see, when Ma and Pa first opened the back door after the fence was installed and said "OK, go play" without putting my least on, I was a bit hesitant.  "Have they finally had enough of my shenanigans?" I questioned as I stared out the door suspiciously, "are they trying to get rid of me--the old open the door, let the dog out, and then quickly slam it behind him?"  

For the first few weeks after the fence was installed, I made sure to stick close to Ma, Pa, and/or Sister whenever I went outside--just in case they tried to make a break for it.  It wasn't until this last week that I finally ignored that little hesitant voice inside my head and let loose by running with abandon through the yard, chasing after a ball (hard to believe, I know, I actually chased after a ball...once), doing figure eights around the trees (skidding through each and every turn--I have grass stains on my chest and legs), and provoking the dogs next door into barking at me.

How did I ever survive without a fence? 

The Floating Sofa

It was while running around the yard at top speed that I suddenly became aware of Ma and Sister dragging an oddly shaped package out of the house and across the yard.

When In Doubt, Sit On It

Being a quizzical dog (not to mention head of homeland security), I wasted no time in cautiously approaching and giving the invader a good once over.  After careful analysis, I determined that the intruder seemed safe enough, but, just as a precaution, I sat on it to make sure that it didn’t have any fight left in it (boy, did Ma and Sister complain--obviously they don’t understand the importance of making sure all invaders are completely neutralized).

After being shooed off the mat, I watched with intrigue as Ma and Sister hung the intruder from two nearby trees.  All of a sudden and before my very eyes, a flat, seemingly harmless carpet turned into a potentially dangerous floating table.  Exercising even more caution, I slowly approached the floating table, but before I could examine it, Ma, throwing caution to the wind, pushed past me and sat down on it!  And if that wasn't scary enough, Ma then lied down on the suspended table! 

Needless to say, I was completely horrified!  Ma was being swallowed up by a scary floating sofa!

Now, I've heard stories about knights in white armor rushing into danger to rescue damsels in distress and I thought, "Hey, I have white fur...that's close enough!"  So, with complete disregard to my own safety, I scurried up to the floating sofa and threw my front paws up and onto it.

Saving Ma

And that's when the floating sofa came alive:  the sofa swung back and forth, Ma's legs and arms flailed wildly in an attempt to escape the sofa's clutches, and I desperately tried to get a good footing in order to boost my back legs up and onto the beast.  After some struggling, Ma managed to get her two feet on the ground and completely blocked me from attempting to jump up and onto the floating sofa.  "Silly dog," she laughed, "this is a hammock!"

Watching Pa Closely

Now, I was assured by my family that the hammock was totally safe, but to be honest, I wasn't convinced.  I decided that it was my duty to keep a very close watch on Ma and, later, Pa while they lounged on the floating sofa and check it out further the first chance I got.

That chance came later in the day when Sister voluntarily allowed herself to be swallowed up by the hammock.  "Here's my chance," I thought as I scurried over to her and, in a single bound, launched myself into the air and landed feet first directly in the middle of the hammock (and Sister's stomach).

The entire world began to move and I was on top of it desperately trying to keep my balance.  The hammock swayed to the right and Sister and I both leaned toward the left which only resulted in the hammock wildly swinging to the left.  Adding to the difficulty of trying to keep my balance was the distracting sound of Sister wheezing because, apparently, she couldn't breathe with me standing on her chest.

After some harrowing moments, I gave up on taming the wild hammock and dismounted (I am happy to report that I stuck the landing beautifully and Sister managed not to fall on the ground).

It goes without saying that I will not be doing that again anytime soon!