Water Is So Bland

Water has a tendency to get a bit boring.  Think about it from my perspective.  Every time I stick my snout down into my bowl, I am faced with the same flavorless liquid I saw the day before and every day for as far back as I can remember (don't worry, it's not the same water--that gets changed out multiple times a day--it's just always water).  How boring is that?  I mean, yeah, occasionally the water in my bowl is spiked with dirt and blades of grass, but I have to add those myself and, frankly, they don't really give it much flavor. 

Now, I know that the humans have many different kinds of drinks (I know this because I've casually stuck my snout in quite a few glasses in my day).  There's ice tea, milk, juice, soda, and coffee to name only a few.  But what does the dog always get?  Water.  It just isn't fair.

Well, this morning I decided to take matters into my own paws.  I had just finished eating my breakfast and was feeling nice and full and feisty (I have a long history of being a little too exuberant after eating--now a days I wipe my snout on the furniture and howl, when I was a pup I'd jump and nip at whoever was in the house with me).  With energy to kill, I decided to circle the first floor of the house in search of trouble.  Taking note of a couple of potential trouble-making activities (one mustn't peak out too soon and blow through all the troublesome things one can do for the entire day in one single sitting), I returned to the dining room to see if my food bowl had magically refilled itself (it never does, but I'm always hopeful).

It was then that I noticed it; something sitting in the corner of the dining room, peeking out from behind Sister's work bag.  It was a shiny green one liter bottle of lime seltzer water.  "That looks good" I thought, my mouth watering at the thought of the fizzy bubbles and limy taste.

Stealthfully, I scurried over to the bottle and nudged Sister's bag off to the side. Careful not to knock the bottle over with my snout (the noise would distract Pa from his breakfast and clue him in on my actions), I grabbed the bottle by its neck and hurried into the living room unnoticed.

"The bottle is mine!" I thought gleefully.  Finally, I would have a refreshing beverage that was not water!

But my victory was short-lived; very short-lived.  So short lived, in fact, that I never got a taste of the bubbly liquid.  You see, I accidentally dropped the bottle on the ground once I was in the living room and the resulting thud alerted Pa to my mischievousness and sent him hurrying into the room to investigate.

Crestfallen, I slunk back into the dining room and got a boring drink of water from my bowl.  It's just not fair!