There are lots of smells in this world. Some are every day smells (squirrels, lizards, and rocks) while others are special occasion smells (brussels sprouts, Christmas trees, and goat slobber). The strangest smells, however, can only be found out east and I got a good whiff of one particular eastern Long Island smell when Ma, Pa, Sister, Aunt B, and I vacationed there over the holiday weekend.
The smell first struck me when I exited the car upon arrival, but, truth be told, I was too preoccupied with helping everyone carry their stuff into the house and, more importantly, making sure all my bones and toys were where I left them, to really take notice. It wasn't until later, when Ma and Aunt B took me outside, that I got the chance to investigate the smell.
It only took one whiff for me to know exactly where the smell was coming from: the yard just beyond the far fence. I ran across the deck, scurried down the steps (I skipped only the final three steps in an attempt to appease my family--they yell at me when I skip four or more), and bolted across the yard toward the fence, my nose held high in the air. When I got to the fence, I found myself faced with a major obstacle: the smell was stronger than it had been up at the house (as I expected...my nose always knows), but I had no way of tracking the smell beyond the six foot wood divide. Desperate to discover what was hidden behind the fence, I started running up and down its length looking for a missing post to peer through.
It was while frantically pacing back and forth in front of the fence that I suddenly became aware of a loud tapping noise coming from behind me. I turned toward the noise and discovered that it was Pa and Sister banging on the window. But they weren't just rapping on the glass. No, Pa and Sister were also acting really weird. You see, they were both making strange hand gestures; Sister held her hands up to the side of her head like antlers while Pa made some sort of bounding wave-like traveling motion with his hands. They also took turns pointing toward the fence. Weirded out by their antics, I decided to ignore my humans who had obviously lost their minds, and returned to my anxious fence pacing.
Although I had no idea what Pa and Sister's strange gestures meant, Ma apparently did and, after alerting Aunt B that there were deer in the next yard, she quickly ran over to the fence and peered over.
Allow me a moment to mention how truly angry I was at this sudden turn of events. I did all the hard work--I sniffed the air, I determined from which direction the smell was coming from, I dashed across the yard at break-neck speed while Ma and B leisurely sauntered over, and I ran back and forth looking for a good vantage point--yet Ma simply strolled over and, using her height advantage, was able to get a good look at the deer hanging out on the other side of the fence. It's just not fair!
Anyway, I'm ashamed to say that the overwhelming smell of deer and the building frustration from my short stature eventually got the better of me and, essentially, short circuited my brain. Even now I don't remember what happened, but I've been told that I suddenly starting racing around the backyard as fast as my legs could carry me. At some point, my front legs got tangled with my back legs (hey, you try keeping track of four legs and a tail) and I had no alternative but to skid on my chest for a lap or two (and let me tell you, you haven't seen grass stains until you've gone skidding through the grass on your chest at a high rate of speed). As though possessed, I weaved through the trees and, on one of my numerous laps, narrowly missing a full on collision with Aunt B. It was only after jumping on Aunt B in an attempt to steal her gloves, that the fog finally lifted and I became aware of my surroundings. Sheepishly (and hoping that Pa hadn't seen my faux pas), I scurried back toward the house.
The deer won this round...the next one would be mine!
I just have one question: What's a deer?
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